A rant about my job...

So I know I still owe you all an Iceland blog or two but I'm just not in the mood right now. For now I'm living  a pity party. Realizing that Jason is going back to work (school) next week and settling into my new day to day life/job has just become a huge bummer. If you know me you know I struggled a long time in decided what to do about my job and in the end it just made "sense" to go with the local nursing home and I kept saying and god had a plan and this must be it... soo here is the truth about it all.

I took this job for the following reasons:

1. I get to live at home
2. My commute is virtually nothing
3. They played the negotiation game with me, meaning I walked away with more money than the other places I had offers from
4. Not having to move, sell the house, find Jason a new job meant more money for us so we can pay back my student loans, save for our future and allow me to work towards my ATP

Reasons I questioned this job

1. I hadn't planned on taking a SNF job... more or less the idea of a rehab was cool with me but a long term care facility or nursing home was not something I was looking for.
2. I don't like living in this small town, what in the world will a nursing home full of the people that were born and raised here be like?
3. My MIL does hair there a couple days a week and is friends with everyone in the nursing home
4. I have a huge desire to work in seating and positioning but this isn't really getting me any closer to it.

So here it is... I've been employed for a month and I'm miserable for the following reasons:

1. The facility doesn't live up to my standards
2. The small town chit-chat and gossip is alive and well
3. My patients are either so high functioning they should be d/c-ed and or go home (but can't because they're demented, family doesn't want them/sold the residents house) or so severe there isn't much OT that can be done because they know they won't be going home and the techs will just do it for them.  I struggle with this every day... most of it feels like a waste of time
4. I have very little to work with 
5. The SLP who thinks she is in charge of me (which she isn't) sits around for a full 8 hours a day doing puzzles... yes, she sits and does 1000 piece puzzles all day and will wait for me or PT to get done with our pt and she'll have them sit there and "put it together". The truth is they couldn't put more than a 24 piece puzzle together with moderate assistance
6. The same SLP likes to make drama, making comments to me about my MIL and gossiping, which is totally inappropriate and annoying
7. I've tried to DC two pts because one has maxed out on potential and is independent with all her ADLs including cussing me out daily and masturbation and the other one has reached an independent status with ADLs as well, she even makes her bed everyday... anyway the administrator requested I continue for another week. I stated my case for d/c but in the end I'm not sure what my right are... do I d/c them and get in trouble?
8. I wasn't smart enough to negotiate immediate holiday days and or sick day so I have none until October
9. I'm the only OT, and due to all the changes with medicare and whatnot if I were to take a holiday or long weekend I have to find someone to cover me. If a pt goes 3 days without OT services I have to d/c them. How freaking stressful. There is no-one to just cover for me. It sucks.
10. There is one resident in particular that haunts me daily, she is not mine but she yells daily for help and it pisses me off beyond belief that the nursing staff ignores her calls, she can't use a call button due to contracturs so that is her way of "pushing the call light". She's 100 dependent on them, covered in wounds and even has wound vacs on. She needs a great alternating airflow mattress. Right now she's got a little air thing that sits on her mattress but it isn't enough. When I hear her yell for help I try to go see her. Typically she just wants to be moved and or reassured she's okay. She's lonely, scared and in pain. I hate it for her. So I sat down and asked the person who handles the ordering requesting a more appropriate mattress for her and she said they wouldn't buy it for her to which I replied they shouldn't accept patients that have those kind of needs then. I'm not really sure where to go from here but I'm considering stopping her family the next time they come in and mentioning it to them. Sometimes the family can advocate better than someone like me, who doesn't even see the resident. Did I mention they are rolling wash clothes for her hand contractures? Totally no-no. This is why I need a senior OT I can call. I don't have alot of experience with hand contractures and I know the wash clothes are a no go but I'm not really sure where to go from there since they won't give me money to buy or make anything for her. 
11. I HATE my "uniform" which is a man's purple polo and khakis. It's horrid. 

What is working for me?

1. It's close to home
2. I get to see Jason
3. I feel like the majority of my patients appreciate me even if it's just because I'm spending time with them
4. I can pretty much make my own schedule as long as I see all my patients 5 days a week
5. I am making a difference for some of the residents 

Thank you for listening. If you have any thoughts or suggestions I'm would love to hear them. 

PS I'm sick of hearing people say "electric chair" meaning a power chair.