So it is official, my parents are moving back to FL and soon. I want to be happy about this... and in a way I am. My dad longs to be in FL, and he deserves to live wherever he wants. I've actually been saying and supporting this for years. That being said I can't help but be a little upset, I mean here I am basically 6 months pregnant, in a job I hate, in a town I hate and they are leaving me.
Does that not sound like a child pouting?
I know I'm not the center of the universe but I guess I just pictured that my parents would be here with me during this new stage of my life. To help me, to guide me and to be the grandparents I never really had. It's depressing... and I feel guilty for feeling sad.
The only good I can see in this is that I keep saying all signs are pointing to Tampa and that's pretty close to where they are moving. Perhaps it's just another sign? Perhaps, my future lingers there too.... but for tonight, I'm going to let my tears fall and I'm going to feel sorry for myself and my own greedy loss. Tomorrow I'll be brave and find the happiness and joy that I should feel for them. They do deserve it. I love them more than words and thank them for all they've done and given me.
PS- My mom says I can blame everything on my pregnancy....
I've got news for you baby...
ReplyDeleteYou ARE the center of the universe.
I just don't know why it's so hard for other people to figure it out!
First, you totally can blame it all on your pregnancy. You will still be sad when the pregnancy hormones are gone but it won't feel like the end of the world like it does now!
ReplyDeleteBut really, I think its a normal feeling to have when you are so close to your parents and you are expecting your first baby. You imagine them being there, especially your mom. You dream for your baby and think about what it will be like for him to go to grandma and grandpas and do all the things little kids like to do with grandma and grandpa. Of course you are going to be sad. I'm sad for you and I cried when I read your post because I moved my baby away from my parents when she was 5 months old and it reminded me how bad I felt about it.
But,I think its a sign you should go too and find a job there that rocks! =) Make me jealous that even more old friends are warm in FL when I am freezing up here! I hope it works out for you Reagan.
Morgan
awww :( now i will be selfish and say that i really hope you move back to FL as well! i definitely know what you mean about wanting them around, and feeling entitled especially since you are the youngest. we should make a phone date this weekend to catch up...
ReplyDeletelove, linds
My dearest sweetest baby girl. You have been the center of our world since the day I knew I was pregnant. I understand just how you feel, I too feel the same way. Just such bad timing. I promise that I will be there for the birth of Egbert and dad will not b far behind. I will stay as long as you will have me , I hate your job so much, and daddies new job may be a way to get you back where you , Jason, and Egbert need to be. I have shed a few tears tonight too, Seems God has a plan and we need to just let him work his wonders. I do not care what it cost, but I will be your back up doula and your ever loving mother. I love you so much and am sorry that we cause you to shed one tear and make your life harder than it already is. God has great things in store for you, I know that from the bottom of my heart. No natter where we live we are only a phone call away, With all my love Mom and Egberts grandma
ReplyDeleteEverything works out in the end. If it hasn't worked out, its not the end. Go ahead and shed your tears its good for you. I'm sure you will end up in FL again when the time is right. This baby will change everything, try to take some time off and enjoy being a mom, its better than any OT job. You WILL get through this, focus on God walking you through, not the Giant throwing the stone. Melanie Mc
ReplyDelete